Saturday, September 13, 2008

Peoples Hate: A place in American Politics?

Every four years I’m reminded of the disgust I have for certain people who are innately angry. This is a statement I make, with all intentions to be vague because these people I speak of never seem to be clear on what they actually hate. And though their hatred is universal it seems when people run for a public office the rest of the haters come out of the woodwork to speak their piece.

This isn’t a diatribe against Republicans or Democrats, Liberals or Conservatives, Tree Hugging Hippies or War Mongers but the fringes of all of these groups and how idiotically cruel I find these people to be.

As I mentioned, the four year reminder is election time. For a year leading up to the Presidential elections I am forced to sift through mistruths and accusations generally started by one of the haters that anger me so much. They start blogs, forums, online society groups spewing nothing but venom and never with any substantiation. Either they’re too lazy to confirm the truth from the falsities or their hate is so strong they would just rather omit the truth to help justify their opinions rather than admit that it is they who are clearly off their rocker.

Again I won’t pick specifics as I believe all of you can pick an instance of what I’m talking about but I ask us all to be a little more diligent when deciding on what we dislike about something. Once that has been achieved maybe we can reserve ourselves from impulse name callings and derogatoriness and try to convey our points in a more humbly respectful way. Anger is a natural reaction and one I think we should all have. It gives us our passion and feeds us the energy to put up a fight. However, we don’t need to attack others that share a common bond in wanting what’s good for country when doing so just because we disagree on the course to follow.

Practicing what I preach is a daily struggle for me as well and I’m no innocent when it comes to what I’ve referenced but I’m more and more conscious of it all as my days go on. Make the effort and make a change.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Meet Al and Marie...


A true short story about Al and Marie.

This is something I'm writing for anyone that's interested in a snippet of an elderly couple's life. To me they're a symbolism of what the best of society can sometimes offer. It is written in two parts because originally this was a two day story from start to finish. I've kept it separated the way it was originally written to keep its mood in the original context.



9/4/2008
Earlier this year I met Al and Marie in the showroom of my dealership. Al was looking for a car that he could replace its 14 year old predecessor with. It had to be safe for Marie, with temperature settings just for her and a bench seat for ease of entry and exit. Both Al and Marie are in their early 80's and what we take for granted they found to be bare essentials.

For whatever reason… ok we'll call it my charm if you insist ;) … they took an immediate liking to me. Though my informative stage of the sales approach was really no different, because of their age I treated them with the patience and absolutely no pressure approach. Quickly they had opened up to me and soon after I felt myself growing attached to them. Maybe it was the protective quality in me or perhaps the complete sap I can be but their demeanor had me in a position where I felt I couldn't do enough for them. It was this amalgamation of good will and trust that formed what I thought was good rapport and now realize to be friendship.

You see, Friday is their 60th wedding anniversary. A point of interest I had learned when they were buying their car from me. But, this was also the very information I reminded them of when they came in for touch-up paint Monday. Al got tapped by a shopping cart at the local Shop-Rite and I, the "good boy", got whacked by my Service Dept for an $8 silver paint pen. Al and Marie also got a well wishing from me for their upcoming big day. With what I had remembered both responded with a look in their eyes where how touched they were, was plainly evident. They seemed overwhelmed with joy and without fear of sounding too feminine, it really was…cute.

Because of our new found relationship I will be visiting them tomorrow afternoon in Newark. Fine folks like these two, with the history they have, are the real deal. The "why" is simple. Not only have they been together for more than 6 decades but they still live on the street they grew up on. The house they've owned for so many years is only 3 doors down from the house Al grew up in. Marie is the girl from the other side of town, 8 doors down. They have invited me out to dinner and what could I say? They're really great and I expect it to pan out as nice opportunity to smile with them.

What I'm assuming in advance is it will be an experience that stays with me forever. The way these two jest with one another and use the marriage one liners is cliché but completely appropriate with them. Undying love is epitomized with them. The intense care they share for one another should be documented now because the frailty of life won't really give them forever. Telling this story, I can help keep them forever when the need arises.

As always, thanks to those who make it to the end…

~Me












9/5/2008
My evening with Al and Marie


I will preface this with a big thanks for all of you that messaged me about what I had written concerning this loving couple.

When I had called Al this afternoon, again it was evident how excited he and Marie were that I was going to follow through with their offer to take me to dinner. In his words, young people are too preoccupied with the fast pace of life and he never expected I would want to slow down to their pace and enjoy an evening of nostalgic small talk.

He was wrong and I'd suspect that the feeling they have left me with will keep me warm when life makes me cold. When it's our family, we often overlook the knowledge our elders give us. Maybe the same stories are told too often, or maybe that pace of life we live in just doesn't have room for the time they have to share but as an outsider to be invited in, they had my utmost attention.

Walking down Bloomfield Ave, each of them holding on to either side of me, we visited some of the places of the neighborhood that had seen change so much. They hold onto memories of watching High School football games in City Stadium and summer get-togethers at the Italian-American club where a nickel bought you a night of dancing and soda. Through their eyes, I envisioned life as what they saw through the landmark reminders of places the city has forgotten.

We got our dinner from a local Italian Restaurant where Al and Marie still argue what they'll be eating. Never to be mean but they're both in a position where they may know each other better than they know themselves. Finishing each other's sentences, hearing the slightest sounds each other make and constantly ribbing each other; reminding me that a life together for so long... "isn't as easy as it looks". But they did, they made it look so easy. There is no way for me to put into words how much they completely adore one another.

After a dinner of me gushing all over them and the waitresses gushing all over us we picked up our dessert from the local bakery. With a coffee ring in tote we made it back to their home of 60 plus years. Marie made us coffee and Al provided the stand up routine and for another hour we talked of life's ups and downs. They explained to me that though they had made it this far and how they joked of it constantly, marriage really isn't that easy. Al and Marie had real hardships in their life, the loss of a daughter, a neighborhood that turned into a war zone, a family that had made lives for themselves further away then their generation had done and battles of sickness and ailments for both of them. Immediately I always understand that so many of us have really had some turbulence in our lives but seeing two people that have beaten its adversities so handedly is nothing short of heroic for me. It's strength like theirs that makes me want that same strength. Stories like theirs that make me remember that my stories have just begun.

~me... again

ps: While there I also took care of that shopping cart damage Al got that Marie is not letting him live down. We also reviewed some of the Al's bells and whistles to make sure he really understands the nuances of his car. Though I was there for pleasure, I figured working a little bit for them may just go a long way for them and their comfort.